I started this new thing lately where I actually write (not type) my thoughts out in a journal every night before I go to sleep. I make sure the thoughts I place are always positive. Even if you’re referring to something negative, you can flip it to a conquer. Let’s say for instance my fiance pissed me off by saying something rude to me, and instead of popping off like I usually do, I’ll just calmly let him know that what he said was rude and uncalled for and left it as that. In my journal, I would put “Was able to avoid conflict and drama by being careful my delivery when I expressed a negative emotion”. For someone like me that like to internalize everything because I’m afraid to open up to people, it really helps. You have to process and express your thoughts. Jotting positive thoughts throughout the day, or even right before you go to bed, helps you sleep better, dream better and wake up better. Even if it’s just one sentence. Place a time stamp next to each thought if need be. This works in a different way than a “blog” because you are actually WRITING and can physically touch your emotions. Even make a list of your goals. Whether they’re weekly, monthly, whatever. If at 9:57pm you realized that you need to go to the gym more, wite it down in your journal. That way 3 months later, you can go back and see when your motivation started. Or, you can go back to see why you didn’t follow through with that goal. Remember how good it felt to write in your diary when you were 10? Men, you can do this too. There’s nothing “homo” about it. Target has the best (and most affordable) journals, all below $20. Try it for a month and give me your feedback in March! I will follow up with some of you on this!
“Everything you want should be yours: the type of work you want; the relationships you need; the social, mental, and aesthetic stimulation that will make you happy and fulfilled; the money you require for the lifestyle that is appropriate to you; and any requirement that you may (or may not) have for achievement or service to others. If you don’t aim for it all, you’ll never get it all. To aim for it requires that you know what you want.”
- Richard Koch
Also: Vent more. Find someone that you trust, and that wouldn’t mind you venting to at least once a week. When you keep everything bottled up inside, all you;re doing is building anger and unresolved issues. Then it starts to affect the way you work, the way you react to people and even the way you sleep. You have to bring that wall down for at least one person so you can let those feelings out. When we are experiencing negative feelings and emotions, such as anger or fear, we may deem it necessary to express such feelings so as not to experience them alone. Or out of fear of being ridiculed or viewed as “weak”. You have to remember: WE ARE HUMAN. Expressing these feelings to someone by talking with them in a calm and rational manner, or by yelling & crying, whichever that’s the most comforting for you, can be very helpful and can actually greatly contribute to our letting go of such feelings. As the saying goes, “A problem shared is a problem lessened.” Just by letting someone else know of our feelings, we may experience release from them and perhaps the person with whom we are talking, will say something that helps us to feel better as well. When we are spinning thoughts around in our own minds, all we will get in return are our own thoughts. When you’re having a rough day, what you need are 2 things: Someone you can sound off to, and someone who will take your mind off things by providing moral support.