One of my major weaknesses is wanting to know why. Why did we break up? Why did you stop calling me? Why did you lie? Why did you hurt me? Mind you, I barely care about you anymore nor do I even want to work things out. It’s very easy for me to move on. You don’t like me anymore? Okay. But why? lol. Why do you think we can be friends after you broke my heart? If you were unable to care for me as a lover, you most certainly can’t care for me as a friend. Why are all the good ones taken? Why are you gay? Why do they always thank you for making them a better person after they moved on to someone else? Why do you have so much balls to smile in my face after what you’ve done to me? It’s just hard for me to have a peace of mind after something ends so abruptly. I also feel that if you tell me “why”, maybe it’s something I can work on within myself, especially if it’s something I’ve heard a few times before. That’s a very small maybe though. Very small.
This is how the conversation would go:
him: I don’t think we should date anymore.
me: Okay. Why?
him: I just don’t think we should.
me: Oh, well, you have a nice night!
him: You too.
This is how the conversation should go:
him: I don’t think we should date anymore.
me: Okay. Why?
him: Because I’m a faggot ass bitch and I prefer to take dick in my booty.
me: Oh, well, you have a nice night!
him: You too.
On another note…why is it that when you give people your all, you only get half in return? I am very particular about who gets to know me and to receive the most endearing side of my nature. So when I do decide to show them that, I expect great appreciation. Keyword = expect. However, it doesn’t always end up that way. You got all of these half-ass people running around, looking for a way to fill in their incoherent void that’s poisoned in their hearts. Sponges is what I like to call them. When you do decide to only give some of yourself, that usually end up being the person who’s most deserving of your 100% and you lose them because they feel you’re not making the glass full. Then you got some people who will throw up this facade that’s fitting to what you appeal to, yearning for your all and when they finally get it, they abuse it. This is the battle I’ve always had when it comes down to relationships. All areas of relationships at that. Whether it’s friends, family, work or companionship. But the area where it’s being hit the most, of course, is companionship. I take all of these risks to weed out the good from the bad because I believe that’s the strive we have to do in order to find what we want. But just like everything else we try to achieve, it gets tiring when you don’t get the results you’re looking for. After awhile, you get fed up. And it’s frustrating as hell. Not only are you allowing people in your life, you’re making it easier for them to hurt you.
I will like to take the time out by wishing all the mothers out there a Happy Mother’s Day and for everyone to appreciate women also. Everyday we should somehow celebrate being a mother, or even just being a strong woman, so make sure you pamper yourself to the utmost today. Men, grab a special woman and do the same for her. Recognize & acknowledge. Some of you really need to appreciate women, our struggle and what we give in this world. We give life, comfort, love, understanding, blessings, backbones, spirituality, joy, happiness, creativity and another reason to be happy for waking up in the morning. When life has no meaning, when you start to feel incomplete, when you’re frustrated or confused, when you’re horny, a good woman’s love will put you right back on your feet! It’s sad that still, most women are being parents alone without the help of the same man that contributed into creating that new life. It’s okay ladies. We are appreciated and honored by many. Our strength and commitment to being independent mothers will be rewarded to us later on in life.
By lovy, May 10, 2009 at 12:27 am
LOVE LOVE LOVE the new layout! As always the post is one I can relate to :blogyj: I sent you an e-mail wasn’t sure if you got it or not, but if you did and you do know of anything out in ATL please let me know.
By chanel, May 10, 2009 at 2:14 am
Yes doll, I got your email. I’ll keep you posted. In the meantime good luck! :love:
By lovy, May 10, 2009 at 7:12 am
thank you? :blogyyy:
By Monique, May 10, 2009 at 12:56 am
sometimes you have to go through the assholes to get to your prince charming; love the blog, certainly an inspiration for people who are going through the same issue :)
HI FIVE :wink:
By chanel, May 10, 2009 at 2:18 am
Dating is just like trying to find that perfect pair of jeans. You go from store to store, trying on different pairs, until you find your match.
By Sage (Shannon), May 10, 2009 at 9:06 am
When you do decide to only give some of yourself, that usually end up being the person who’s most deserving of your 100% and you lose them because they feel you’re not making the glass full. Then you got some people who will throw up this facade that’s fitting to what you appeal to, yearning for your all and when they finally get it, they abuse it.
That is so true. I started realizing that I was doing this and then I’d feel so bad but still at the same time, I was half-assing, doing exactly what I didn’t want done to me. I think that everyone deserves closure in any relationship so we can move on without wondering.
By Mallory, May 10, 2009 at 6:41 pm
“Why?” …one of my favorite expressions! Why? …because it goes so far & I, too, need it. That is just who I am. Anywho, I can agree with this & I feel like this a lot. However, I’ve never been in a relationship of which you speak, my needs come from friendships & family. As you said, all relationships we expect such things! It’s a shame most people only give half-ass though.
Totally off topic…for some reason, your images don’t want to load in Firefox? …unless it’s just my computer because this Internet Explorer sucks too. :\
By Kristina, May 10, 2009 at 10:13 pm
LOL I am always asking why, and I wish I read somethng like this 2 months ago when I was dealing with a half ass relationship. You hit the nail! :happy:
By Ms_Slim, May 11, 2009 at 12:18 pm
Love the new layout. Very nice and I love the picture-art up top especially!
“Not only are you allowing people in your life, you’re making it easier for them to hurt you.”
This is the issue I have in relationships. The whole ‘risk’ thing is just sooo hard for me, especially since my recent heartbreak. And since I still havent really gotten ‘closure’ from that situation, it’s even harder for me to start anything new in full. The walls I’ve built are thick and hard. Sometimes I get worried that they’ll never be able to be broken down. I’m just really afraid of getting hurt. It’s a mess. And I hate taking such a risk.
Thanks for this post. Since I’ve started reading you, it’s like all of your posts seem to fit me for that day specifically lol
By Nile, May 11, 2009 at 6:48 pm
I use to ask that, but I do not care anymore. It just made me very angsty right after my divorce. I was just about rock bottom and needed help so badly it was scary. I almost did feel like I had died. It was after counselling and some time that I felt pathetic for letting my ex-husband treat me the way he did.
I just go pick up my son and try to ignore my ex. Taking the risk in loving another is a learning experience. It is up to you to just let it go and move on no matter how much of a jackass they were.
By Shonni, May 12, 2009 at 12:43 pm
Love Love Love this entry! The dialogue was hilarious! After my divorce I actually didn’t care as to why that fool did all the crap he had done. I never expect any man to be perfect, however I do expect them to strive for perfection and get as close to it as possible. You can’t make a commitment and half step. I think some just get too damn comforatble and feel like they don’t have to work for it. You work hard to get it and once achieved you slack…hence the honeymoon stage. Fuck that I want a honeymoon that lasts a lifetime. I always try to give 100% I expect the same in return…it’s all about standards. Gotta have them! Really enjoyed the read lady =)
By tiff, May 12, 2009 at 5:59 pm
But Chanel, it ISN’T weakness though! lol, I really think for you to wanting to know “why” to all those little concerns you have in the back of your mind truly does benefit you, it doesn’t hurt.
Knowing why would give you a sense of closure and certainty.
Knowing why would make you learn from your mistakes, if any.
Example:
Me: Why won’t you talk to me anymore?
Dude: Because you smell.
Me: Ok, I should work on that.
By tiff, May 12, 2009 at 6:00 pm
Also, kind of off topic but, I really love this layout. Do you make your own layouts?
By Azalea, May 15, 2009 at 7:18 pm
“I am very particular about who gets to know me and to receive the most endearing side of my nature. So when I do decide to show them that, I expect great appreciation. Keyword = expect.”
I think I was completely opposite and wish I wasn’t. I would always let a guy know all my feelings and emotions. I would give them everything. I don’t know if they would get overwhelmed or just disgusted with me but none of those relationships ever ended well. I always blamed myself because I felt like I was doing too much. But I realized if someone really cares about me they won’t mind hearing what I have to say or how I feel. I’m just glad I don’t have to deal with the ups and downs different males emotions and only have to deal with 1 which is still a lot though lol. Great post! :blogyyy:
By L.S., May 15, 2009 at 9:44 pm
“I am very particular about who gets to know me and to receive the most endearing side of my nature. So when I do decide to show them that, I expect great appreciation. Keyword = expect.”
So do i, girl. so do i.
And even though it’s rather late, i still want to wish you a happy mother’s day.
By LIT, May 16, 2009 at 10:52 pm
YOU ‘ R A BEAUTY> ADD http://Twitter.com/black_lit