no doubts.

Question no one; Answer to no one. I trust and accept all the good things that make their way into my experience. I trust and accept all the love offered me. I trust and accept that peace and happiness are my birthright. We’ve all experienced it– that moment when we look for the imperfection in what appears to be flawless. It’s that split-second when our wounded, frightened emotional self rises up, takes the helm, and announces, “This is too good to be true.” When that moment happens our perspective shifts from open-hearted acceptance to fear-based faithlessness. The experience can spark a witch-hunt for reasons to doubt someone’s words or distrust their actions, no matter how full of integrity they truly are. Of course what we’re really hunting for are reasons to sabotage the flow of good in our lives, either to avoid being vulnerable or to validate the belief that we aren’t worthy. Whatever the underlying reason, if we allow ourselves to proceed with sirens blaring, looking for evidence to support our negative storytelling, ...

the reality checks that I deposited.

I've had some reality checks the past couple of months (good and bad), and also been taken aback by what's been going on with the media, law & just humanity as a whole. In the meantime, I did not allow this wacky world deter me from my desires and goals. I am still designing websites & have grown more passion for my craft. If you need an amazing site designed by someone that's reliable, personable, result driven, and will go above and beyond to satisfy your needs, all for less than $800, contact me. I don't have the ability to draft a complete blog due to my thoughts being all over the place, so I will just list them. 1. As you progress, becoming happier, and exude more positivity, the more people will try to tear you down. Do not be surprised if it mostly comes from your inner circle and/or your loved ones. Ignore it and move on with your life. Never stoop to their level. People that act this way ...

bummed out.

I've been down in the dumps lately because I feel like my whole summer has been wasted because of my health. Having gallbladder disease was no joke! The strict diets, the sporadic nausea, the throwing up every other day, the pains, the Vicodin, the Zofran, the Percocet, the Ambien. I was completely over it. I finally had it removed on July 17th and can eat whatever I want now, but the recovery is still tiring as well. I still have 4 bullet size wounds trying to heal on my stomach, I can't bend over (there goes my sex life), and my stomach is still puffy from the surgery. So I feel fat. I don't look fat, but I feel fat because of the swelling. Many people have promised that if I give it another month my body will go back to normal again, but that only sounds good if it was Winter time. It's 95 degrees every day! And while I can't wake up until 1pm, can't go to the ...

i hate stripping.

This is deep. While this may not apply to everybody, it definitely applies to some. Well put @loanyg. I just want to let everyone know that this was written and recorded in the middle of last year but Im JUST now posting it. I kind of felt that if I would have posted this video while I was still dancing, it would have been a bit of contradiction. Update: I am no longer dancing. Pursuing my photography and working so that I can build on my artistry. - Loany G. Good for you babe. Best of luck with your future endeavors!

where do i go?

It’s hard to find someone that will listen to my own issues. When you become a reliable source, people don’t want to hear about your own problems when you’ve become the person that "comforts". I’ve been told that I know just what to say & exactly what to do to turn the worst situation into a conquerable challenge. I mean shit, almost everyone in my life calls on me when it comes down to resolving their issues. I guess because I’m strong. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but since I’m so strong, where do I go? Who do I lean on? Where do I go when I’m not feeling so strong anymore? Take my site for instance. I probably get 5 emails per day filled with other people’s problems. And not simple stuff like “What should I do about my whopping cough”, but about deep embedded issues like family problems, parental tips and survival tactics for your emotions. Sometimes I feel pressured. Then other times I feel real ...

for the record.

If I didn't make it clear before, then I'm going to make it clear now. I have no tolerance for people who want to half ass their way into my life. Nor my heart. It's very disheartening when you give someone the chance of a lifetime, then they go screw it all up with one word. One action. Or even no action at all. You can't sit there and tell me that you've "changed" when your actions and intentions are a mirror reflection of how you were when I first met you. I once was confused beyond natural belief and I had no clue what to do about a particular person in my life and our situation. The anger I had built up scared me. That anger became buried in my own emotional battles and I forgot about it. Years later, I rationalized I became forgiving. But just when you thought it was safe, I was disappointed again. Now, I can feel the frustration, anger and resentment that I had for ...

thoughts.

It cracks me up how people will look at you and automatically assume your personality. "She think she's all that". Oh yeah? How do you know what someone's thinking? Especially if you don't know them? Apparently YOU think she's all that, being that she never told you anything of the sort. And on the same note, why not try to compliment the woman than bring her down? There will always be someone out there that looks better than you. Deal with it and handle your insecurities accordingly. I'm getting very tired of picking up my manager's slack at work. I'm going to find a way to avoid doing that, without jeopardizing my job. She doesn't come in on time, always taking off, yet if I did it, it would be highlighted somehow. We all have a job to do. When I fall behind, I don't try to slide my work on to others. I guess this is what happens when you mix business with pleasure. Do I need to disassociate myself ...