Strength | chanel.

esteem booster.

The foundation of our happiness is to have a positive sense of self-value. This also guarantee success within ourselves. When we doubt ourselves and allow people to treat us less than our value, we become worthless. Regardless the level of your esteem and security, always remember that you’re unique and you have a gift to offer. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. If they do, they are just jealous because they never gotten the chance to know you and know what you’re about. Characteristics that they find as flaws, the next person will adore it. They will follow, monitor and even try to sabotage you just so their miserable ass can nitpick for something out of the ordinary. Let them continue. It means nothing to you & neither do they. You have an unique quality within yourself that they are lacking and instead of acknowledging that quality & giving credit when it’s due, they try their best to convince themselves (and possibly others) that you are the opposite & commence to bring you down.

I , for one, refuse to allow that happen to me. I wake up everyday just knowing that I am fabulous. No, I don’t think I’m better than you. No, I don’t think I’m prettier than you. And no, I am not vain. I am able to recognize that I have something valuable to give the world and no matter how many people wish I didn’t have so many talents that make me the person that I am today, they will never dim my light that shines from within. If you’re insecure or have low self-esteem, keep rehearsing that in your mind. Like I stated before, what you may find “wrong” within yourself, there’s someone out there that will embrace that and love you for you. Take no shorts, cut down on the compromising and never settle for less. Believe in who we are & what we do. Look up to & trust ourselves to make it through the difficulties just knowing that we can. We are the only ones who are responsible for building that self-confidence. Don’t do it for him. Don’t do it for her. Don’t try to prove them wrong. Don’t worry about their negative opinion. We’re all are equipped & capable of getting to where we want to be as long as we create a positive pattern of self-worth. Continue to believe you’re the best because you are the best. And no one, I mean no one…..can tell you otherwise.

Remember: Success and happiness is the best revenge. The more successful you get, the more people will try to bring you down.

fighting for love.

Many of us think we are lucky or blessed when we find the right person to love. By now, we know that nothing in life is an accident, including our selection on who we catch feelings for. Very often we go into relationships with the idea that we can make somebody better. We see and know their flaws and take it upon ourselves to help them fix what is wrong. Our task in our relationships is not to fix one another. Our job is to love what we see and support one another in doing better. If all fails, just say goodbye to that relationship. Sometimes they’re simply not ready for a commitment. I used to have this unrealistic expectation in certain people to just flat out act right and handle themselves (and others) in a respectful, mature way. Having consideration & being appreciative. In order to fall in love, you need strength to fall out of it. Just in case. Love can either make you or break you. And trust me, it has broke me many times. Not saying that I have been in love a lot, but there were people that I did truly love, unconditionally & platonically, who didn’t share the same love in return. I’m grateful for those experiences because it wouldn’t allow me to love the way I love my boyfriend today.

There’s a big difference between fighting for the one you love and fighting with the one you love. You can love them for who they are and what they are and stop complaining. But if you keep going in and out of the same relationship, chances are you are going to get hurt. People come together in a relationship to learn. Once you learn your lesson, take that same lesson, and move on to something new. You can do the same old things in just some many ways until you lose track of what you are doing. How many ways can you cry? How many ways can you hurt? How many ways can you convince yourself that you can make this work? When a relationship is over, you need to recognize that fact, disassociate yourself from that person and then let it go. No matter how much you love the other person, or how afraid you are that you will never love again, you cannot squeeze juice from a piece of dry fruit. So don’t bother trying. Praying won’t make the relationship work. Losing weight won’t make the relationship work. Changing your hairstyle won’t make the relationship work. Nothing will make it work until you realize why it’s not working.

Love is knowing, it is not a condition or state of mind. When you are loving, you are not doubting, judging or fearing; you are are in a state of acceptance. You accept yourself first, for who and what you are, and then the person you love, without question. When you are in love, you feel vulnerable and know that it is okay to feel that way. You leave your emotions out there on the table, without the fear that they will abuse it. You don’t hide your feelings, change them to fix what you think the other person wants, and you do not question what you feel. When you’re in love, there’s nothing to fix. All you’re doing is building. For the better, for the both of you.

wednesday.

Today is Wednesday. And I am so happy where I am in my life right now. Last year this time I had different goals for myself. As each year goes by, my emotions and outlook about life & love vigorously changes. I used to be a mixture of emotions. Used to wait until a particular day/date before I decide to make the changes I need to make. Unsure if I am supposed to make those changes. But now my mind is clear about who I was, who I am and where I’m going. This ongoing battle that I used to have with my mind versus my heart was such an incredible power that it literally expanded whatever I touched. When I was faced with a challenge, obstacle or problem, my tendency was to cut it off. Now I nurture it. Now, through the process of elimination, I evaluate the situation first to see if it’s even worth my personal care. Our thinking process harbors the issue. Our hearts…well…simply tells us different. We talk about it, but we don’t come to a solution. We describe it vividly, but are unable to recognize it when it’s in our face. We monitor its progress day by day, imagining how much it’s growing & how it’s effects are devastating every aspect of our lives. Yet we still allow it to. You know what we’re doing? We’re giving it more value than it’s worth. We’re settling due to our selfishness. Where do we find that strength to stop it before we hurt ourselves? Why wait until New Years? Or your birthday?

Are you able to make the right long-term decisions instead of just living for today? I simple adore being embraced, appreciated & loved for the woman I am. And nothing’s better than being acknowledged of these things by your family, friends & significant other. But what do you do when it’s all coming from the right places at the wrong time? I’ve grown to notice that the most beautiful things happens at the most inconvenient times in our lives. It gets to the point where you have to pick, choose and then eliminate one of those inconveniences. We can think, speak and bring the best possible outcome into existence by focusing on where we’re going, not on where we think we are. Think about it…how far can you go living for today instead of catering to your future happiness? Best things happens to those who wait huh? I waited (for years) and everything is falling into place. Exactly where I want them to.

But what if you’re tired of waiting? What if you end up having faith into the number one thing you don’t believe in? They say everything happens for a reason right? Well maybe this time, you should go against the grain and just see what exactly is the reason why you continuously challenge yourself. Stop focusing on “what’s not there” & be grateful for what is.

Note to self: There’s nothing special about today. It’s not a Monday, nor is it my birthday. It’s not New Years, nor is this a resolution. If you want to make a change, start now.

esteem booster.

fighting for love.

wednesday.

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