I’m getting very tired of picking up my manager’s slack at work. I’m going to find a way to avoid doing that, without jeopardizing my job. She doesn’t come in on time, always taking off, yet if I did it, it would be highlighted somehow. We all have a job to do. When I fall behind, I don’t try to slide my work on to others. I guess this is what happens when you mix business with pleasure. Do I need to disassociate myself from her and keep it strictly professional now because she’ve gotten to comfortable with me? Also, leave your personal issues at home. We all have child/relationship/money issues from time to time. You’re no different than the rest. Leave the “oh woe is me” act or the “imma be a stink bitch until I can get my rent paid” attitude in the parking lot.

Is it just me or is it that the people who gripe and complain about “being left alone” are the main ones who actually create the drama they’re currently in? The best way to handle it is to simply ignore the person. Don’t reply to their bullshit, don’t explain yourself, don’t try to validate your points. Just refrain from entertaining it. All that energy you’re placing into acknowledging them is actually just fueling the fire even more. Please don’t forget there is a reason why they focus on you so much. Pop your collar.

Advice for those that don’t like me but they refresh my site on a daily basis:  The more you stay out of my life, the more I will believe that you have one of your own.

I took the day off Friday. I think we all should request at least ONE day off per month to reclaim your sanity. Especially on the months were you get no holidays off.

I’m not quite sure what’s going on with 2009, but this year seems like a year we will never forget. People are stressed out, losing their jobs, losing their homes, losing their minds. It’s insane. I’m not feeling the way the government are handling things either. All these “bail outs” for these major companies, yet the average person is unable to get approved for a loan? Something’s fishy about that.

Why is Barack Obama the blame of our current financial situation? He’s been in office a little over 100 days and now he’s the reason why America is in shambles? Weren’t people getting laid off, gas prices went up, and troops were sent to Iraq before we even knew he was running for President. Why is he being rushed to fix our country so everything can go back to normal again? Newflash: Bush was in office for 8 years. It took him 8 years to fuck up America. Ever tried cleaning up someone else’s mistake? Doesn’t it take longer to fix than the actual task of completing it correctly? Oh ok.

Lighten up people. Things could be a lot worse.

Being in the vicinity of ignorant people is not my cup of tea. They try their best to convince me that they’re not like the rest. After time has pass, many have proven themselves to be just that. That’s when I disassociate myself from them, which usually lead to unfortunate events.

It’s so disheartening when someone close to you tries to hurt you. When they purposely want your heart to bleed. What is the quality of your intent? Certain people have a way of saying things that shake us at the core. Even when the words don’t seem harsh or offensive, the impact is shattering. The intent behind the words is what hurts me the most. Not the fact that you called me out my name. The fact that you tried to belittle me. The fact that you were trying to hurt me. It takes a lot for someone that I care about to make me feel like shit. But when you’re desperately trying to?…that’s when I feel betrayed. Can you imagine arguing with someone close to you over something small & because you made a good point, made them feel stupid if you will, and they turn around and calls you a nasty name? What would anger you more, the fact that they called you a nasty name or the fact that they tried to hurt you?

When someone does you harm, is it right to do the same thing in return? No. Naturally, we react in a negative way thinking it’s okay because they did it too. Truth is, you can never get even with someone who has hurt you. Any attempt to do so puts you behind the bad karma mill. “Two wrongs never make a right”. Pretty much, you can’t right a wrong by committing another wrong. Funny how hard it is to live by that simple rule. You may be able to justify your actions politically or socially, but spiritually you will be held accountable for what you do. Why you did it, doesn’t count. I’m an avid believer in karma. Regardless of what someone did to me I refuse to stoop to their level and try to hurt them back. Before I matured, I just knew for a fact that that was the “proper” way to handle things. Obviously, our life works just like a boomerang so whatever you do, the effect of that action will come right back to you. So, while you’re sitting there, watching someone’s miserable insecure ass calling you all types of names to anyone that will listen, or in your face….always remember that they are the ones that are truly hurting inside. They are the ones that owns some sort of envy towards you. The question is, are you going to allow it to happen again by sticking around?

Isn’t it ironic that the people who talk shit about you really have no room in doing so in the first damn place? When did someone with no job, no home of their own, no kids, no car get the nerve to talk shit & try to look down upon someone who has a job, has their own place and has their own car? How can you clown another man for driving a Nissan when you’re pushing a raggedy ass Buick? How dare you call her a slut when you’re not faithful to your own? Why are you claiming Barack Obama is your idol yet you haven’t taken care of your kids in years? Why frown upon Jay-Z & Beyonce taking 5 years to get married….where your marriage license at? When did it become okay to condone domestic violence if the woman is the one throwing punches but it’s not okay if a man beat your ass for hitting him? All your life I never heard you mention a word about God but now that you found out you have a disease you’re in church every Sunday? You’re tired of  “these gold digging bitches” yet you wanna take her shopping on the first date? Time to check that reality and humble yourselves people. Last time I checked, your shit stink too. Maybe even more.

And what about the people that you reject? Whether it’s a man after the first date or a woman that you used to hang out with. You feel rejected? Get over it. It’s as simple as that. Don’t try to insult me nor what I represent just because I didn’t kiss your ass. Maybe the blame should be on your limited way of thinking. Or maybe it’s your lack of reality, education…experiences? I can promise you that the same person that rejected you isn’t paying you no mind anyways. They can careless how you feel or what you say from this point on. If you understand that you can only draw to yourself what you already are, you can see rejection in another light. If your self-esteem was higher, you wouldn’t succumb to having a fit when you’re not the one that they chose. If you worked more on your insecurities, education level, financial stability or sexual morals, you’ll be able to curb those child-like traits that make you perform the stupidity that you do each day due to the rejection.

We all know at least one person who’s guilty of one of these subjects I touched on. Maybe of all these things. The sad thing is, it’ll take years before they realize their wrongdoings. Do like I do and ignore their ignorance (one of my favorite quotes). Eventually they will get over it. Unfortunately, most people don’t and they never will. Because you’re that damn great. ]]> http://kisschanel.com/the-nerve-of-people/feed/ 16 http://kisschanel.com/life-goes-on/ http://kisschanel.com/life-goes-on/#comments Sun, 16 Nov 2008 05:13:16 +0000 chanel http://chanellie.com/?p=313 Life is going to be a challenge. There will be rough times, difficult situations, major obstacles and forks in the road that will distract you from reaching your destination. There will be manipulative people that are envious of your accomplishments & people that will succumb to spreading rumors about you because they don’t have what it takes to reach your level. For every personal goal that I’ve tried to accomplish there was always at least one thing (or one person) trying to get in my way. But I’m no fool. I looked beyond that and kept striving to succeed. Granted not everything I started I finished, but I gave it my best while I was active in it. The only way to get where you want to be is to do what needs to be done to get there. Now that you know what to expect, prepare yourself. Never give up on what you believe in. It really doesn’t matter how long it takes to reach your goal. As long as you have determination and motivation to get you there. The moment you give up on doing it, it will never get done.

Everything that we experience, everything we think, feel and do is in divine order and if it’s in a path to do someone wrong, karma will catch up with you. Life is fabulous. I refuse to allow anything or anyone shit on my parade. I wish I would allow any sort of drama, stress, disappointments and betrayal get the best of me anymore. I can’t stop it from happening because that’s just how life is and sometimes we have to struggle through that, however, I can stop it from derailing my natural being. My power of ignoring comes very handy at this point. But sometimes you tend to wonder why certain things happen. Why people can’t just think before they apply action. Do they know that unless you can benefit from it in the future, whatever they think, say or do to you will only make them look stupid? Me? I can give a remote fuck what’s being said about me amongst juvenile individuals because they serve no purpose in my life. While all these games, charades & senseless rumors are going on there’s a strong being called reality that you have no clue about. And while you’re suffering from the lack of reality, everyone else around you are climbing to higher levels. My reality does not involve any of you. I don’t do things in life to impress anyone but myself. I don’t go through great lengths just to prove anyone wrong. That’s for young minded people with low self-esteem and insecurity problems.

As an adult with 29 years of knowledge, I refuse to carry myself as a predictable woman with no standards or morals. I have enough experience to know why things happen and why people act the way they do. I’m not even going to ponder on why certain things happen. I already know the answer to that and it’s very very sad. But in general, they happen because they are meant to strengthen our ability to handle anyone & anything at any given moment. It happens to put you right back on track on who, when and what to trust. Everything that you go through happen the way they should, at the right time, to the right people, and ended the right way. The only job we have, is to know we are equipped to handle it. I know I’m equipped to handle just about anything because I am strong minded, experienced enough, independent, assertive and realistic.

Are you?

Random Thoughts:

1 – Annoyance. Please tell me who was the super-size geek that created the robot phone operator? This has got to be the most annoying invention of mankind. You call your cellphone company & the first 17 minutes is spent yelling into the phone & you haven’t even reached a rep yet. Why am I fighting with a prerecorded voice? You are literally arguing with a machine that you said BILLING and not SALES. No matter how many times I say “operator”, the stupid bitch keep saying “Okay, before I connect you, please tell me what is the problem?”. The problem is YOU, for pete’s sake. I always end up yelling “CUSTOMER SERVICE!” or vigorously pressing “0″ so I can get a live operator. When will these companies realize it’s much more annoying and time consuming than keying in the options through your phone?

2 – Gross. Do I really want a man to refer to me as a “Bust It Baby”? Ya’ll do know the song is about being a woman with extraordinary carnal abilities. No thanks. I already know I’m good. I’d like to be remembered and referred to for my fantastic yarning skills.

3 – Redundancy. Why send me a message on Myspace, asking me the same questions I’ve answered all over my page? You send a friend request, I accept you, then you go back to my page, just to send me a message to ask “Where are you from?” or “How old are you?”. That tells me that all you did was look at my pictures.

4 – Speaking of Myspace, if you don’t have an actual contract, you’re not a model or a recording artist. Spare me with your jobless ass.

5 – Racists. Please don’t take your hostility out on me because Obama won. I didn’t take my hostility out of you when all of the other 43 presidents won.

6 – Please keep your bad ass children at home. I refuse to feast at PF Changs next to a 4 year old crying over not having mayonaisse.

7 -  Now that gas is finally back to $1.90, what are you going to do with the extra $50 you saved on filling your tank?

8 – When did not being a gentleman became cool?

9 – Excuse me miss, but why are you the one pumping gas when there’s a grown ass man in your passenger seat?

10 – You don’t have to like it. Because there’s someone out there who loves it. Remember that.

OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA

BARACK OBAMA!!!

Most of you fathers have a fucked up perception of what fatherhood is about. In order to be a true father, you need to be present. You need to spend time with your child and get to know them. There’s a big difference between talking to your child and getting to know your child. You should be able to know within a heartbeat what flavor ice cream they like and why they don’t like going to Math class. Buying nice things are temporary satisfactions to children. You can buy a Barbie doll today, and your daughter will forget about it by next weekend. However, if you spent the day with her, and only her, that gift will last a lifetime. It becomes a memory and you can never throw those away, nor will they expire. This is why you need to get your act together now, before it’s too late. Don’t allow your child to form a negative opinion about you. Once that crosses their mind, it’ll take years for their perception of you to be replaced with something good. So what if you don’t like your child’s mother anymore. So what if she’s crazy. Has these reasons ever stopped you from having sex with her? So why they stop you from embracing a human being that the both of you created? A part of you? There are ways to still nurture and raise your child without having to deal with the drama. Mature adults are capable to put their differences aside and come together as parents to do what’s best for their children. Regardless what differences they may have within each other. The child should not be punished due to that.

We, mothers, are sacrificing ourselves more these days. And not just financially. Our entire livelihood as changed because we are the sole providers for our children. We’re the ones who has to wake up at 5am, Monday through Friday. Not only to get ourselves ready for work, but to prepare our kids for school. Then once the work day is over, we’re the ones who has to come home, help them with homework, provide dinner on the table, and talk to them about any concerns or issues they have for the day. It’s 8pm by time you realize it. Let’s not forget that we do not have the luxury to come and go as we please. A child is like a purse. You cannot leave home without bringing it with you. With that being said, we have to turn down more party invites, dates, house guests, the way we speak, who we speak to, the way we look, our goals, our future….our entire way of living. This is a life long sacrifice that 2 people are supposed to make. Not just one. Now with that being said, do you really think by just sliding us a few hundred dollars per month is going to compensate and fulfill your role as a parent? All you’re giving up is a couple of dollars. We’re giving up that and also ourselves. Let’s try to flip it a bit to see if you can a better sense of what I’m talking about. How would you feel if you were craving attention, affection, love and commitment from a woman who claims she loves you but instead of giving you that, she slides you $200 per month, while patting herself on the back as if she’s the perfect girlfriend. Along with the $200, she’s only came to see you twice. Has she met your needs? Is that good enough to have a faithful long-lasting relationship? Wouldn’t you seek elsewhere to fill in that void?

This is not about me, it’s not about you, it’s not about us. It’s about our sons. It’s about our daughters. Our children. Let’s get over ourselves and focus more on the innocent. Because surely, it’s not their fault. If we do this more, there will be less single mothers struggling, there will be less disharmony in our communities, there will be better & stronger relationships and marriages will last 50 years like our great-grandparents. The cycle will be broken once a change is made.

We need fathers to realize that responsibility does not end at conception. We need them to realize that what makes you a man is not the ability to have a child – it’s the courage to raise one. We need to help all the mothers out there who are raising these kids by themselves; the mothers who drop them off at school, go to work, pick up them up in the afternoon, work another shift, get dinner, make lunches, pay the bills, fix the house, and all the other things it takes both parents to do. So many of these women are doing a heroic job, but they need support. They need another parent. Their children need another parent. That’s what keeps their foundation strong. It’s what keeps the foundation of our country strong.

The first is setting an example of excellence for our children – because if we want to set high expectations for them, we’ve got to set high expectations for ourselves. It’s great if you have a job; it’s even better if you have a college degree. It’s a wonderful thing if you are married and living in a home with your children, but don’t just sit in the house and watch “SportsCenter” all weekend long. That’s why so many children are growing up in front of the television. As fathers and parents, we’ve got to spend more time with them, and help them with their homework, and replace the video game or the remote control with a book once in awhile. That’s how we build that foundation.

Hurry up and make some changes men. Because soon, your child will be calling someone else “daddy“, if they even call you that. Why would you want another man to take credit for something so beautiful, that you helped created?