Invent


where’s the respect?

I find it very strange lately how the level of respect for women has lowered lately. I’m not speaking for the women who don’t carry themselves with respect. Sorry. I can’t bring myself to defend women who demoralize themselves. I’m speaking for those who are classy, tactful and independent. Those who work hard for their own and take care of their responsibilities. Why would a grown ass man open his lips and dare call that woman out her name? I’ll tell you why. Their depleted ego. Something in their life didn’t go too well. Ever rejected a man, whether it’s in passing at the mall or after the 3rd date, and he calls you a derogatory name? Or even spread a nasty rumor about you?

Look what Mariah Carey is going through currently with Eminem. All because she did not want to acknowledge their “fling”. He talks shit about her in most of his songs. Years later, she finally decides to respond with her song & video “Obsessed”. What he does next? He responds with a song threatening to release voicemails, nudes pictures & incriminating evidence that they were together. So the fuck what Eminem? Move on. He is the epitome of what I’m talking about. A bitter man who does not know how to get over it and move on. Funny thing is, Rick Ross has called him out many times but he never responded. However, he chooses to pick a fight with female? That’s real manly you dude. We will never question your sexuality Eminem. Oh, and let’s not forget how so many people were actually cheering Chris Brown for what he did to Rihanna. Do you know how many people were attacking Rihanna? Granted Chris Brown received much deserved flack for what he’s done, but Rihanna received just as much herself. “Good for her, I didn’t like her anyways.” What?! Why is that? Why no one wants to back up a woman anymore?

These things are very uncalled for. Not only are you embarrassing yourself as a man, you look like bitter scorned bitch. No one wants to hear your stories about why things didn’t work out between you and ______. So what if she wasn’t what you expected her to be? Who cares if she broke your heart? Does that warrants you to drag her name through the dirt? Do you really believe, in that pitiful insecure mind of yours, that saying all those things make you the better person? What ever happened to cherishing, loving, nurturing & respecting your woman? I understand that rejection can be painful. I understand that there are days where you’re not in a good mood. But that doesn’t make it right. If we, as women, count on a man to protect us, yet that same man disrespects us, who are we to turn to after that? It’s bad enough that we, women, tear each other down on a daily basis. Being in the vicinity of a man takes away the grief that we go through.

I don’t want to bring the media up in my argument…but I have to. I’m seeing women getting exploited more & more on television and I don’t think there will ever be a turn around point. I would not be surprised if one day I turn to a sitcom and they’re showing nipples & bare ass on there. But on the flip side, you barely see men half naked or being depicted as sexual objects. The larger viewing audience are women. Yet, you have half-naked moaning women plastered all over television. Who are they appeasing? Certianly not me…

(Speaking of the media…) Have you ever noticed the way the media advertise depression amongst women? As if we are the only ones that are able to get depressed? Why are they stereotyping women with depression? If women suffer depression because of the “social denigration” they endure, why is it that men also suffer major depression, and commit suicide in numbers far greater than women? Sad that rather than focusing on real underlying causes of depression/anxiety (loss of community, affluenza, promotion of superficial looks) we get ads for a quick fix pill instead. No profit in truly emotionally healthy people I guess huh? As far as I’m concerned, women are targeted to take anti-depressants & the social denigration they face is rarely discussed as a reason for her sadness. I strongly believe the problem is the way society and the media portrays us. As if we’re a bunch of overly emotional creatures. We have the same emotions as men. The only difference is, we express it outwardly much more & with more confidence than men. As I look through Sports Illustrated or a Maxim magazine I have yet to see a prescription drug ad in there dealing with depression. Or weight problems. Or anxiety attacks. Instead of describing depressive illnesses in terms of specific symptoms & medical terms, as they did when the era of Prozac began in the late 1980s, the printed news media are now far more likely to depict women’s mental issues in relation to gender-stereotyped roles, like marriage, motherhood, & menopause. And just like I stated before, descriptions of depression in men have not shifted in the same way. The media, the pharmaceutical industry, the strategically placed ads and commercials. Its all aimed to play on the “weakness” of women. We got to the doctor far more and often end up only handed a pill to fix it rather than given an opportunity to be heard to communicate that there really is an illness at work here.

I don’t know if there’s something in the water, or what. All I do know is, something’s gotta give.

Edit: You can find me at http://diaryofchanel.com if you want some short-text daily rants, ramblings & farts.

Read more...


fyi…

My standards aren’t high. Some men are just used to low class bitches.

Read more...


two-timing yourself.

We’ve all heard the same cliche and explanations on why some men cheat. “It’s in a man’s nature to cheat” or “All men are dogs” or “All men let their little head control their big head.” Adopting these empty, blanket statements will only disable us women from properly selecting a suitable man. We end up settling with a cheating man. During your years of finding & understanding love, you find yourself experimenting and doing things. You’ll even place yourself in compromising situations. Ever notice we wait until the absolute worst happens before we disassociate ourselves from a situation? Why wait that long? Do it from the moment you sense that things aren’t going to work out as planned. That’s how you learn right from wrong. I learned not to settle for less and you need to walk away from a situation before it becomes worse. I chose to walk. Yes, it hurts like hell. No, I will not go back.

Let me reflect on the females who repeatedly become “the other woman” and enjoy it though. You know the ones that are consistently chasing taken men. Thinking that they MUST be fly as hell because he’s willing to cheat on their wife for them. Please. This is caused by their self-esteem, or lack thereof. Deep down, they believe that they do not deserve more, that this was “all they could get”. So they took it. The “the other woman” don’t have to go through all the gripes (ie : bills, chores, family functions & etc). There’s only one positive thing from ever being “the other woman”. The emotional dependence, anxiety, insecurity and sense of abandonment that comes from being a mistress, can be a learning experience. You discover what you don’t want, and what you’re entitled to. Which is love, respect and honesty.

What about the women who stay with their cheating men? Why do they do that? Oftentimes, when a woman is with a cheating man, she automatically internalizes his infidelity, as if she could or should have done something about it. In many cases, when a woman finds out that her man is cheating, she starts asking herself “Where did I go wrong,” and “Why wasn’t I good enough for him?” I also hate the excuse that we (as women) out number men. Especially down here in Atlanta. Some shit about a 10 to 1 ratio? Well, that’s bullshit. Regardless of how many women that are out there, that is still no reason for you to go a pursue one of them when you have a good one at home. Here’s a tip = When a man cheats, 80 percent of the time it has nothing to do with you. You’ve grown to love him unconditionally. His family adores you. The sex is BOMB. You’ve adapted to his surroundings. You know him like a book. You’ve spent so much time and effort to make this relationship the way it is today. And you refuse to let all of that go to the “next bitch”. You will not throw away __ years so some other tramp can win what you worked so hard for. Right? So you stay with him. Believing that he’s your molded trophy & you can’t get no better. Assured that things will eventually work out. He has guaranteed that it was a mistake and it will never happen again. “We’re human and we’re entitled to our mistakes” he tells you and promises it was only a “one night fling”. He was drunk/stressed/lonely/unfocused/drugged/pressured/tempted. So, instead of calling the one that loves him, he decides to destroy the relationship for 38 minutes of random pussy. Placing himself, and you, at risk of unwanted pregnancy, STD’s and HIV.

Do you really believe that’s what love is about? No. I believe the real reason why certain women stay with their cheating men is insecurity. You’re scared to be alone and you don’t believe in yourself to believe that you can find another man. A better man at that. You may have full confidence in yourself but do you have confidence in what you deserve or can achieve? You think this man is going to be the only “close to perfect” man you’ll ever encounter? That’s because you’re thinking with a one track heart instead of thinking with your mind. Sure you love him but you do not have to be with him. Life goes on after a broken heart. From someone who’s experienced it before, I can promise you that. While you’re in the moment you’re going to feel like he’s the only one. You will never love someone like you love him right? WRONG. We develop the idea that we only have one true love. That’s not true. That’s caused by loving with our hearts and not with our heads. Under these conditions, if things do not go well, it has nothing to do with our hearts. It’s our poor choices that have caught up with us. The only thing we can do about a cheating man is leave him alone. And for the 32% that stays with that man and “work things out”…more power to you. Better you than me…

Thinking you can do something to stop a man from cheating is like thinking you can do something to stop it from raining outside. You can hope and wish that the rain will go away, but when it’s raining outside and you have no umbrella, you have two choices: go inside where it’s dry, or stay outside and get wet. And if you happen to encounter a cheating-type man, you have two choices: you can accept the infidelities and hope he stops lying, or you can move on to a better situation. You choose your destiny and you choose how you want to be loved. And frankly, love doesn’t involve betrayal.

This is a throwback post.

Read more...

Disclosure.

The content of kisschanel.com, text and personal images, are ownership of Chanel Cheeks and copyrighted by me unless stated otherwise. No reproduction of any of the content shall be used without prior written consent. If you want to quote me or repost one of my blogs, please send an email requesting permission to do so first. The proper credit link must state the following: Originally written by Chanel @ kisschanel.com. Stealing blog posts is frowned upon on the internet and will result in people laughing at you for at least 5 years. This website is not recommended for inmates, ingrates or anyone professing an irrational fear of cats or for people over the age of 120. Full disclosure.

Google.

Twitter.

Design Services.

Free Quote
- You may use this form to send me a detailed email to request a quote.
Testimonials
- Clients feedback about Kiss Chanel Designs!
Terms Of Service
- Rules which a person must agree to abide by in order to be a client of Kiss Chanel Designs.

Visit also our social profiles:

Scroll to top