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credits to ledux.

Cyber Stalking- Stalking on the Internet

Recently there has been an emergence of a new kind of stalking, commonly referred to as cyber stalking, which simply means the use of the Internet, e-mail, or other online, electronic communication devices to stalk another person. Cyber stalking takes on many forms such as sending e-mail to the victim, impersonating the victim in chat rooms and e-mail messages, and spreading untruths in a chat room. The Internet is a very efficient and inexpensive way for cyber stalkers to intimidate, terrorize, and harm their victims while at the same time remaining anonymous.

The internet has made it way too easy for people to stalk you. Stalkers always claim they’re not stalking you, but is able to comment on everything you ever said or did on the internet. They’re able to quote what you tweeted. They’re able to find your old pictures. They’re able to find all of your friends that are online too and they start keeping up with them. They save your blogs, pictures and blood type. And here’s the hypocritical portion of everything:  They get upset when they see that you found out about them & like to tell YOU that YOU have no life for checking up on THEM checking up on YOU (did I lose you there?). I will admit, I check on my stalkers from time to time. Why? So I can be kept abreast on the fact that they are still stalking me. Right now, I am aware of 5 people that are currently internet stalking me (I’m sure there’s more). But the only reason I know about these 5 is that at some point, each one have lost their cool & blew their cover by addressing me. One is dated as far back as 2002 but she’s slowed down immensely (at least I think). Another I believe started back in 2006, but she stalks a few other people as well so she stalks me whenever it’s my turn on her schedule. Then I have a bloated blogger from 2009 that started stalking me as soon as I rejected him. A self-proclaimed “doctor” that knows the first day my boyfriend and I met (from stalking my tweets). And last but not least, the one that’s been actively stalking me since 2004 & is still stalking me to date. She is able to tell when I am ovulating. Where do they find the time?

You what a stalker’s favorite rebuttal is: You’re a “nobody”. If I’m such a nobody then why are you keeping up with my nobody ass? “You’re a nobody!” – Yet they can name who you’re fucking, what school you went to, what club you go to, the model and year of the car you drive, saved 30 of your pictures, know what day your sister got married, know how many hours you worked this week. Sheesh. When do you brush your teeth? I mean, according to you, I have no life. I’m ugly, worthless and a nobody. So, judging by this concept, why are you concentrating on me so much? Who really sits at home and concentrate on a “nobody”?

Stalkers will also try to flip it on you and say you are the one stalking them. However, why is it that they will know a lot about you but you know nothing about them? And God forbid they get a hold of who you’re friends with and who are your enemies. They will try to befriend both ends of the stick. Mainly the enemies, so they can feel like what they’re doing is right and to convince other people that you’re the issue, and not them.

Stalking takes a lot of dedication & focus. I don’t know what provokes someone to stalk, but it’s clear that they need professional help. Especially if you had no physical interaction off the internet. I know for a fact it involves a high level of insecurity, low self-esteem, childhood issues and bad breath. I can’t remember a conversation I had with my boyfriend last week but a stalker will remember what day you posted a tweet about chewing bubble gum from last year. Now that’s talent!

The more you keep up with someone’s life, the more you’re missing out on yours. I guess it’s fair to assume a stalker don’t really have much of a life. Otherwise, they’d be too busy living it and not watching you live yours. Every move you make online, it is being logged & reported. The “delete” button only deletes it from you & the public to see but the information still remains in the company’s database and it will be accessed once it is subpoenaed by the courts. In other words: You are not as anonymous as you think you are. One woman sued Google to get the information about a woman who created a slanderous website about her. She is currently serving 3 years probation and that’s ONLY because the accuser requested for her to not serve any jail time. Remember, Internet stalking is a felony and you may never know who is able and willing to press charges against you. (:

These are very resourceful links to read through and gather information from. If you are considering prosecuting your stalker, you will have to contact your district attorney’s office and then they will guide you through the proper channels for your state.

• Cyberstalking Laws – ncsl.org
• Federal & State laws On Cyberstalking – haltabuse.org
• Need A Lawyer? – stalkingattorney.com
• Stopping Internet Stalkers – associatedcontent.com
• Free Cyberstalking Lawyer Consultation – yourcriminaldefenselawyer.com

Here are a few success quotes I live by:

Success is how high you bounce when you hit bottom.  ~ George Smith Patton

The man who has done his level best, and who is conscious that he has done
his best, is a success, even though the world may write him down as a
failure.  ~ B.C. Forbes

Success:  To laugh often and much, to win the respect of intelligent people
and the affection of children, to earn the appreciation of honest critics
and endure the betrayal of false friends, to appreciate beauty, to find the
best in others, to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child,
a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has
breathed easier because you have lived.  This is to have succeeded!  ~ Ralph
Waldo Emerson

Taking someone for granted: People become too comfortable with you when you’re too nice. Then, when you decide to tell them about themselves, you’re not acting like “yourself”. Not entirely true. I am being myself. It’s just that I’ve remained nice for too long. I kept catering, and only catering, YOUR feelings. You keep fucking up, I keep forgiving and now you’re taking advantage of me. It stops today.

Cowardice: An example of cowardice is telling everyone how you really feel about a friend, except for the actual person. I’m the type of person that if I have an issue, I’m going to address it with you. Not with Tom. Not with Keisha. With YOU. These days, people don’t have the balls to tell you how they feel. They don’t have the loyalty to talk to you directly. These days, people aren’t able to handle confrontation, or constructive criticism. The world revolves around them. Everyone wants you “keep it 100%”, but when you do that, they don’t want to accept what’s handed to them. “Communicate with me”. Grant them their wish, next thing you know, YOU’RE the one with the “issue”. You’re the “delusional” one. “Girl, you’re tripping”. – No, I’m not tripping. You just can’t handle the truth. When all is said & done, you got nothing accomplished. You walk away feeling like things are unfinished and then the “friend” runs off to complain to OTHER people about you. Instead of just keeping it where it was: private. There’s a name for people like this that also falls under the category of cowardice: bitch. Also: Male bitch, female bitch, immature bitch, big bitch, lil bitch, insecure bitch, self-centered bitch, dumb bitch & stupid bitch. Everyone wants to be respected, without actually giving that respect. Well, you’re not going to get what you don’t deserve. Fuck you.

This week, I don’t know. I am exhausted. I feel like so many people have showed their true colors towards me. Either they’re jealous of what I have going for myself or they want a piece of my positivity because they’re too miserable to find happiness on their own. Well, I got news for you, I’m over it. I’m over getting riled up. I don’t have the energy for it anymore. From this day forward, I’m only going to focus on the positive.

Yes…you read that right. I’m a fraud. I’m one of those people who talk so much about love, but is unable to determine it on her own. The ones that I’ve told “I love you” to, I never really loved them. At least, not the way I ought to. I was more in love with the fact that they loved me. I was infatuated with the way they cared for me. I lusted for them during the first month. But as time goes on, I started to lose that attraction. Then my patience starts to wear thin. By this time, I’ve gotten so used to being with this individual, I end up settling. Without even knowing that I have. Then that’s when it happens. Doubts. Doubts can break any bond you have with an individual. Do I really know this person? Is he really the one for me? Random thoughts start to surface my mind. Thoughts of who I wish he was more like. Thoughts of the good times I used to have with other men. Thoughts of the man that I believe to be, my ideal mate. Why I always find myself back in his arms? I don’t ever like to go backwards with relationships, but he always seem to be the exception in that rule. Like, no matter what we go through, we always end up back together. Like nothing ever happened. Is that what love is?…or is it something else? Is that healthy?…or is that self-destruction? Questions, questions, questions…that never seem to get answered…

I love you, but I’m not in love with you. I don’t think I ever was. You know who you are. And it’s more than one of you. I battle myself from time to time and try to figure out why I am like this. I’m quite sure I have broken many hearts due to my own selfishness & confusion on what love, for me, is. And I apologize for that. The biggest hint that lets me know that I don’t really love the person I am with is this: when they threaten to leave, I don’t object to them doing so. I’ll sit right on down, and watch them go. Do I cry? Nope. Does that make me an emotionless bitch? Nope. Just means that I didn’t care enough. I did, however, recall one time in my life where I did ask a man not to go. I actually fought for him not to leave. And he never left. The same man who holds that mysterious power over me. And you know what, I hold that same power over him. But why do we find ourselves apart every so often? Is that sign that we should leave each alone? Perhaps. So, if that’s the case, why do we always find each other again?

Right now in my life, I am overjoyed. My career, my financial status and my loved ones are kicking ass. I am definitely happy. But obviously…I am confused beyond natural belief. Confused as to why I feel this way and confused as to why I made the decisions that I have made this year. I have no clue what to do and it’s scaring me. Usually I’ll have a solution straight off the back when I’m presented with an ultimatum. But what do you do when the pros & cons weighs out pretty much the same in either commitment? The worst thing I can do is nothing. I want to do the right thing for me. I believe the decisions that I’ve made in the past week were the best for me right now. I swear decisions have so much power. They usually take me to the exact place I need to be, exactly when I need to get there. Maybe I should take some chances. Take some risks. Follow my heart. Since time and opportunity wait for no one, my life will not stand still until I figure out what to do. I’ve gotten so used to the way my life is, and how I handle “love”….I’m afraid to fall into it again.

I hope I’m doing the right thing…

Wow. Can you say “caught up”? I’m so glad I was able to experience those feelings because if not, I wouldn’t be so clear in what I want in a man, a relationship and love. I have such a strong embrace on love now, I take no shorts. Which is where I want to be. I feel sorry for those women that accept less than what they deserve or downplay the actions of a man. Fronting as if that’s what they want or that “it’s okay”. No it’s never okay to be treated less than what you’re worth. It’s never okay to remain somewhere when you’re not 100% happy. Even if it’s just a “sex” thing. Why give someone a coupon on your self-respect? If you allow to receive 50% of what you want, you’re giving people the legal right to only give you 50% of themselves. The neverending story you tell others as if things are how you want them to be are just a front. And you’re are only kidding yourself with those fraudelent storytales. Or maybe you’re trying to convince yourself. No matter what the circumstances are, we as women deserve to be treated how we represent ourselves. Unless you want to find yourself in a dead end relationship wth no real commitment to love.

It’s time to reflect on where you are and if that person deserves to be there with you. Love isn’t confusing. Lying to yourself is.

“the best friend” written by chanel.

As you can see, there will always be consequences just when you think a person is gaining. The woman in that poem didn’t conquer. She failed miserably. She failed her morals, self-respect and her life by having sex with her ex-boyfriend’s best friend and bringing in a baby for all the wrong reasons. She was successful in so many ways but not with her relationships. No matter how you dress it up, it’s always wrong to get involved with someone one of your close friends, or family member, used to date. If any of my friends introduce me to a man that they say they have a “crush” on, I would never make any moves on him. Or allow him to do the same to me. It’s trifling and dirty. I am immediately turned off by him because I know how my friend feels about him. I will acknowledge the fact that he’s good looking, as approval, but that’s it. Personally, I don’t think it’s appropriate. So what if he made a pass at you? So what if she always bats her eyes at you and cries on your shoulder. So what if you were drunk. They are off limits. I feel people do things like this to achieve jealousy as a reaction. But little do you know, the friend you’re stabbing in the back will never trust you again. The ex usually ends up feeling betrayed and see you in a different light. Is your reputation worth all that? It’s bad enough you got your ex running around telling people about your relationship. So now he/she can add “slut” to that equation. Would you want your ex best-friend telling everyone “That bitch tried to fuck my man”?

I’ve experienced a friend (more than once) making inappropriate comments about a man I was interested in or went on a date with before. I’ll laughed it off but in the back of my mind, I got my eye on them. If I see a pattern, that’s when I will pull her to the side and tell her how I feel. I think most of us have experienced that. Where your friend’s intentions with someone you have interest in is questionable. I’m not sure what causes these things to happen. I can easily blame it on insecurity or their lack of class and self-respect. One thing I do know for sure is that may be a sign towards the beginning of a doomed friendship.

The only thing I can advise is to take heed and keep your eyes open. If the unthinkable actually do happen, you have all right to let that friend go.