Invent


obsession.

People not being able to get over it: Why it seems as if the people that dislike you always find themselves most active in your life? They tell you (and others) all these things they don’t like about you, but still involve themselves in your surroundings. They observe how you carry yourself, who you hang out with, things you say and still complain about what you’re doing. Isn’t this like a form of stalking or an obsession? Then when you comment upon their actions, they have the nerve to tell you to “leave them alone”. Funny huh? I’m glad I became one of those people who sits around contentedly, ignoring how the people who dislike me behave. In any way possible they are crying for your attention. They want it. They need it. As much as they hate you, there’s something about you they yearn. If you dislike someone so much, then keep it moving. Why place yourself in their environment, just to complain about them more? I didn’t know an individual that’s not in your life can place so much affect into it. No matter how you look at it or try to downplay your actions, it’s still unhealthy. School, work, internet, church, club, bar…doesn’t matter. Unhealthy obsession. A healthy obsession would be focusing on solving a problem or focusing on something good. An unhealthy obsession is the constant focus of energy on something to the point that the obsession causes harmful consequences in your life (ie: emotions, negativity & etc.). They are both bad when they are to an extreme but to be persistent about something or someone that you don’t like is absurd. It’s a very annoying waste of time and if you don’t have control over yourself, to some degree, you will be ridiculed. Most of the time, obsessions come up when you’re trying to fill a sense of emptiness in your life. Thus the reason why when we disassociate ourselves from someone they tend to come around even more. I just don’t see the point in it all. If you’re not going to benefit from your actions why do it? If I hold no weight in your life, why concentrate so much in what I do? Why dislike me so much, yet, be so engulfed into what I am about? It makes no sense. Things I dislike the most I keep out of my sight and out of my mind. I don’t clutter my brain with extensive amounts of it.

If you spend more time figuring out your own life, instead of mine, you’ll be a much better person. Take the separation for what it is, and just step.¹

You can be jealous of someone for as long as you like. You can talk shit about them for as much as you like. You can try to break them down for as much as you like. At the end of the day, they will always have something that you don’t and they will continuing to strive to be better than you. So all of your weak attempts will go null and void, however, karma’s watching. Be careful of what you do to other people.

¹This blog is a throwback. Originally posted on June 1st 2009.

Read more...


internet politics.

Ever notice how logic changes when you’re online? Things that are normal in everyday life becomes “abnormal” once you hit the internet. The politics caters to the lack of logic and insecurity others have. Things like wearing make-up and catering to a woman are shunned if you talk about it online. Here’s a list of the most common.

1) “She doesn’t post body pictures, therefore she’s fat.”
When you take pictures of yourself, most of the time you’re focused on your face. Just because you don’t take a picture of something, doesn’t mean it’s of the negative. A lot of people believe it’s not necessary for everyone to see what they’re “working with” or to post pictures of their body parts. While the occasional party, hanging at the mall, karaoke pictures are posted, most people are not thinking about taking a picture to post online when they’re actually outside enjoying life.

2) “She’s photoshopped.”
Just because someone has great skin, or because they enhanced the brightness or contrast of an image, doesn’t necessarily means she’s “photshopped”. The baffling idea that someone would photoshop their nose smaller, or butt bigger is one thing, but to claim someone is photoshopped just because they’re actually attractive shows how insecure you are. Most pictures are taken by cellphones these days, which means the quality of the image doesn’t come out that great. Granted you have women that photoshop themselves beyond recognition, but most of the time, the pictures are just being touched up for better quality. People used to (still do actually) accused me of photoshopping. Of what…I don’t know. Truth be told, if I were to photoshop something, I’d erase these hereditary bags away. But I’ve learned to live with my flaw being that it’s a family trait. Now if I turned my bubbies from a 36D to a 36HHH, we got problems.

3) “Men that compliment women are gay.”
Wait a minute. I thought gay men don’t like women? Not regular men who are able to show a queen some respect. A man that shows women respect online is more than likely to be called a pansy than the one who sits around all day disrespecting women. I blame their insecurities and the fact that they’re unable to handle rejection. Or little dick syndrome.

4) “If you don’t post pictures of it, it doesn’t exist.”
Not everyone wants to show off their new car, son’s birthday outfit or engagement ring on the internet. Even though it’s 2011 and everyone post pictures of their birth control pills, there are still millions of people who still use a lot of discretion on the internet. I only like to share intimate things with the people I am intimate with. Privacy is the main reason you won’t catch me posting my child’s picture anywhere. I did it before on my website, but then a disrespectful comment rubbed me the wrong way & I never did it again. I don’t post pictures of my vagina, but you know I have one, right?

5) “He didn’t respond to you, he’s a punk!”
I’m not sure if you’re aware of this but, a lot of people don’t get online to indulge in internet beef. Sounds strange doesn’t it! Especially if it’s with someone you don’t even know. To argue everyday, with the same individuals that you don’t even share the same air with, is ridiculous & a waste of time. Ignore ignorance. Sometimes it takes some time for a person to realize that. I used to argue everyday on AOL. But that was when I was younger & immature. After awhile, it gets tired. Monotonous. It solves nothing. The person still doesn’t like you, they’re going to talk shit about you regardless, so why not just ignore them? Trust me, it worked for me. Put it like this, treat these people like a rat in a house 500 miles away. It doesn’t exist to you nor is it invading your personal space. Like the saying goes “Walking away doesn’t mean that you’re a quitter, it means that you are intelligent enough to know when to quit.”

The diagnosis: The internet is the easiest way for insecure people to cope with the struggles they’re having with their immediate lives, self-esteem and social issues. So they channel their hypocrisy & contradictions via social medias. It’s your job to recognize who these people are, and stay clear away from them.

Read more...


escaping the torture.

I’ve never been a victim of domestic violence, but I can imagine how hard is it for a woman to leave the situation. To be honest with you, I’m unable to advise you a way to leave if you’re caught up in a physically abusive relationship. These are dangerous situations and the best answers you can get are either from a counselor or a police officer. Personally, I would leave that man alone from the first moment he hit me. Fortunately enough for me (and him) I’ve never been hit by a man before. I can’t just imagine the consequences he would have been faced with it from my friends & family if they ever seen me with a black eye, caused by some dude. Here is a letter that Karrine “Superhead” Steffans wrote recently in reference to her current situation:

I’ve been a victim of abuse all my life –– literally, for as long as I can remember. It is my norm. Whereas most people would run in the other direction the moment someone physically, emotionally, or mentally abuses them –– I stay.

It’s a sickness and just when I think I am cured, the cancer spreads.

For the past several years, I have been involved in a highly abusive relationship. I have been choked, whipped with belts, thrown about, berated, belittled, raped, and disregarded as a human being. I have been abandoned and embarrassed, then, loved and coddled.

I have been caught in a vicious cycle and have left on many occasions, just to return.

I have found little support from my friends and family because I complain, and I cry, then I go back for more. I go back knowing that, one day, he’ll kill me but he’s all I have. He’s the only one who understands because he’s stuck in this cycle, too.

When I try to confide in friends they ask, “Well, what did you do to him? What did you say to him?” They tell me, “You know how he is, he’s never going to change, so why do you stay? You know what you’re getting into. Don’t tell anyone because he’ll come out looking good and you’ll only make yourself look bad.” It’s always my fault.

No one understands – not even me.

So, I keep it all to myself and it continues. Then, we make up and vow it will never happen again –– then it does and I feel so foolish for ever believing he can change or that we can change. Then, I begin to believe again. I believe even now.

I love him though it pains me to admit. It sickens me to know that I will return to him in an instant and that the next time could be the last time and that breath, my last breath. Still, I hold out hope that one day we’ll learn how to love one another without pain. I pray that those who look on with smirks and judgments know one thing –– domestic violence is very real and, at times, very final.

Karrine Steffans‐McCrary

Now, while people want to judge her and suspect that this is a “publicity stunt” being that she has another book coming out, you may never know that this letter may help another woman who’s in dire need of some help.

If you, or someone you know, has been a victim of domestic violence, please contact the National Domestic Abuse Hotline at (800) 799-7233.

Informational Links:

Read more...


karma is sugar.

Revenge sounds so sweet when you’re stronger, smarter and doing better than your enemy. You know you have all of the equipment for payback. You have the ability to make them feel like shit and to further show them how worthless they are. You have the perfect ammo. However, seeking revenge against someone who has done you wrong, is only going to make things. Just wait on their karma. It’ll catch up to them much better. Furthermore, nothing makes an enemy more sick than to watch you succeed. I used to be real big on revenge. If you do me wrong, I can do you wrong better. But then a miracle happened: I grew up. I realized that spending time on that negative energy will only bring negativity to your life. I’ve reached a point where if someone I cared about did me wrong, I’ll just let karma take it’s course. Because there’s no way to avoid it. It’s impossible to duck karma and believe that you will get away with the things that you’ve done. Just because I don’t retaliate over the things you’ve done to me, doesn’t mean you’re clear and free from any consequences. Shit is going to come back on you tenfold. Ever seen someone go through a slew of  “bad luck” and is unable to recuperate? That’s not bad luck. That’s their karma. Bad luck is when you’re able to rise above it. To bring good from it and to strengthen from it. But to those that are being intentional with their malice, continue on being the hateful person that you are. That’s why no good will ever come to you. That’s why you lost your job. That’s why he cheated on you. That’s why she’s treating you like shit. That’s why you’re always losing money. That’s why you’re stuck in a miserable relationship. That’s why you’re losing your hair. Don’t blame it on luck…blame it on karma. Which is why I took the word “revenge” completely out of my existence. I don’t want guaranteed mishaps to interrupt my happy life. No ma’am.

Here are a few success quotes I live by:

Success is how high you bounce when you hit bottom.  ~ George Smith Patton

The man who has done his level best, and who is conscious that he has done
his best, is a success, even though the world may write him down as a
failure.  ~ B.C. Forbes

Success:  To laugh often and much, to win the respect of intelligent people
and the affection of children, to earn the appreciation of honest critics
and endure the betrayal of false friends, to appreciate beauty, to find the
best in others, to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child,
a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has
breathed easier because you have lived.  This is to have succeeded!  ~ Ralph
Waldo Emerson

Read more...


tired.

Karma: It’s a major task to not seek revenge when someone do you wrong. But when that same person keeps testing you, it becomes hard to “turn the other cheek”. Where I’m from, we say fuck the other cheek. Seek justice. Don’t get me wrong. Karma has not failed me. Eventually, I will get an update on how a person who was vindictive towards me is doing, and 9 times out of 10 they are not doing okay. I smile whenever I get these updates. Not because I wish bad on people but because I am satisfied that karma finally catches up them. However, I’m tired of waiting that long for karma. And I want to take up matters in my own hands. Because I do it so well, and so much better. Recently I had a patient who was relentless in her attempt to get me fired. All because I wouldn’t give her what she wanted. Had I give her what she wanted, I would have jeopardized my job because it was against the rules. But not giving her what she wanted ended up in her trying to get me fired. You’re damned if you do, and you’re damned if you don’t. I thought about sneaking into the parking lot and giving this spoiled rich bitch a piece of my mind, and maybe a piece of my knuckles. But it was raining and I didn’t feel like getting my hair wet.

Taking someone for granted: People become too comfortable with you when you’re too nice. Then, when you decide to tell them about themselves, you’re not acting like “yourself”. Not entirely true. I am being myself. It’s just that I’ve remained nice for too long. I kept catering, and only catering, YOUR feelings. You keep fucking up, I keep forgiving and now you’re taking advantage of me. It stops today.

Cowardice: An example of cowardice is telling everyone how you really feel about a friend, except for the actual person. I’m the type of person that if I have an issue, I’m going to address it with you. Not with Tom. Not with Keisha. With YOU. These days, people don’t have the balls to tell you how they feel. They don’t have the loyalty to talk to you directly. These days, people aren’t able to handle confrontation, or constructive criticism. The world revolves around them. Everyone wants you “keep it 100%”, but when you do that, they don’t want to accept what’s handed to them. “Communicate with me”. Grant them their wish, next thing you know, YOU’RE the one with the “issue”. You’re the “delusional” one. “Girl, you’re tripping”. – No, I’m not tripping. You just can’t handle the truth. When all is said & done, you got nothing accomplished. You walk away feeling like things are unfinished and then the “friend” runs off to complain to OTHER people about you. Instead of just keeping it where it was: private. There’s a name for people like this that also falls under the category of cowardice: bitch. Also: Male bitch, female bitch, immature bitch, big bitch, lil bitch, insecure bitch, self-centered bitch, dumb bitch & stupid bitch. Everyone wants to be respected, without actually giving that respect. Well, you’re not going to get what you don’t deserve. Fuck you.

This week, I don’t know. I am exhausted. I feel like so many people have showed their true colors towards me. Either they’re jealous of what I have going for myself or they want a piece of my positivity because they’re too miserable to find happiness on their own. Well, I got news for you, I’m over it. I’m over getting riled up. I don’t have the energy for it anymore. From this day forward, I’m only going to focus on the positive.

Read more...

Disclosure.

The content of kisschanel.com, text and personal images, are ownership of Chanel Cheeks and copyrighted by me unless stated otherwise. No reproduction of any of the content shall be used without prior written consent. If you want to quote me or repost one of my blogs, please send an email requesting permission to do so first. The proper credit link must state the following: Originally written by Chanel @ kisschanel.com. Stealing blog posts is frowned upon and will result in people laughing at you for at least 5 years. This website is not recommended for inmates, ingrates or anyone professing an irrational fear of cats or for people over the age of 120. The content on this blog is the opinion of myself, not intended to “malign any religion, ethnic group, club, organization, company, or individual,” especially those that are very bored with nothing else to do that will try to fight back anything that I have to say. My intention is to not injure others, just in case someone believes I made their genitals bleed by blogging about love & relationships. Full disclosure.

Twitter.

Design Services.

Free Quote
- You may use this form to send me a detailed email to request a quote.
Testimonials
- Clients feedback about my services and more!
Terms Of Service
- Rules which a person must agree to abide by in order to be contracted with Kiss Chanel Designs.
Portfolio
- My portfolio and a more in-depth look at Kiss Chanel Designs.

Also visit my social profiles:

Scroll to top