“My dad was an alcoholic, that’s why I drink so much.” “I was abused as a child so beating my kids is the only thing I know.” “Everyone at work did it. Why can’t I?” Spare me. Stop blaming everyone else for your current condition & take full responsibility for yourself. People choose to be who they are. All of these poor excuses/justifications you’re making for your wrong doings is only making you appear more weak minded. You don’t choose your family because you’re born into them, however, you make the decisions in who you friends are because that’s the privilege we have. Correct? So why can’t you apply those same decision making aspects into the way you lead your life? Just because you were exposed to alcohol usage, that doesn’t mean it’s okay for you to become an alcoholic. Just because your father physically abused your mother, doesn’t mean you should ever fall prey to hit a woman. I don’t care what you’ve been through. We have been going through life long enough to learn not to make excuses for our faulty ways. How do you expect to grow if we’re unable to learn from our past? From what we’ve been exposed to? If I continue to blame everyone for where I’ve been, isn’t is just as fair for me to blame myself for where I go? We have a reason to be vulnerable or even angry about our history, but there’s no reason for us to remain where we are. There’s no reason to aimlessly try to follow the footsteps of someone else erroneous behavior.

You’re the only person responsible for your happiness. One of our main goals in life is to not be dependent on someone else. To take strides within our own paths in a route that we’ve created, on our own, as the years have gone by. Why let someone else conditions place a restriction in your path or on who you are? Yes I understand we’re influenced by at least one person in our lives, but that doesn’t mean it’s okay to clone their behavior & follow in their negative footsteps. If my mother’s greatest attribute is always giving a helping hand, yet, her least appealing attribute is her addiction to drugs, which one you think is best to pick up? With that being said, spare me the drama and the tear sheds of whoever, whenever, why ever such & such made you act the way you do. All that tells me is that you’re more weak minded than I thought. Mature people with strong minds gives no excuses for their actions. They embrace their shortcomings and if it affects others, they will try their best to fix it. Stop giving the word “influence” so much power. According to dictionary.com, influence means “To affect the nature, development, or condition of.” Interesting. Looks to me, it can work both ways. Positive & negative. Yet, you chose the negative (otherwise known as the meek) route. I really don’t care what you’ve been through to be honest. Granted, scars don’t heal but they are not meant to be the blue print of the rest of your experiences in life. I was raised on getting beatings (or the more politically correct term, spanking) however, the way I raise my daughter is the total opposite of that. Not once have I ever used a belt on her or threatened her physically. And guess what? Her mannerism is outstanding.

Too many people have allowed themselves to remain in situations that are unproductive. All of this blame we place on everyone else for the things we’re unable to do for ourselves are becoming a bit tedious. If you ask me I think it’s all a crock of shit. All this blame being placed on other people is just holding your own life back. While you’re sitting there feeling sorry for yourself because of what someone else did or did not do. Own up to your shit and flip it to something positive. I know for a fact that you know at least one person who was raised a certain way and exposed to certain things and have become the total opposite of what’s been instilled in their mind. Aren’t you one of those people?

As long as you find someone else to blame for anything you are doing, you cannot be held accountable or responsible for your growth or the lack of it.